Tags
cia, Et Cetra, future, life, occupation, performing, problems, rambles, rant, renaissance woman, self, something, TV
So I have this problem (well it may not be exactly a “problem”) where I watch something or I hear or I read about something and if I like that something that becomes all I want to pursue in my adult life. And usually my vision of what that would be like is completely incorrect and I realize it, but I still want to pursue whatever grand majestic occupation I’ve seen somewhere.
That was as clear as mud.
For example (I have literally 100 examples), when I saw the first Transformers movie quite a few summers ago all I wanted to do for a month was work in the Pentagon. Largely because I wanted a big, shiny computer like the characters did in the movie but it really did look interesting. And whenever I see any spy movies I really want to join the CIA. So badly. All I want to do is learn 5 languages and walk around foreign cities like I know everything and I would because I would be a spy and spies know everything. Then I went through a phase where I wanted to write screenplays (and I still legitimately would like to do that). And whenever I watch Masterpiece Mystery on Sundays I literally go to bed trying to figure out how I can get myself to Oxford and solve crimes because I seriously love Sherlock, Inspector Lewis, Endeavour. When I watch Star Trek all I want is a spaceship. A small one would do the trick…And of course whenever I see a performance, of any sort really, all I really want to do is perform and be on stage for the rest of my life. But I can’t do that forever, at least I know that.
Oh and the other day I watched this really great Chinese film called Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon and for a good 48 hours all I could think about was how to move to China and learn Kung Fu. Even though everything in that movie was completely fantasy I was determined to learn Kung Fu.
Agh, this is my biggest problem. I want to do everything. This is why I am so indecisive because almost everything sounds fantastic in some sort of way to me.
Can I please just do everything?
Maybe I should be a Jack-of-all-trades. I would like that. I could be a Renaissance woman. Someone who has many abilities and does many different things. I don’t know. What will I do with my life?
Something. I will do something. And one something will lead to more somethings.
Hah. How reassuring.
This was a weird post…
Stay Excellent,
Cranberry Lorraine